Love yourself
date: 2012-12-08 time: 21:20:07
It's easy to be hard on yourself. But when you tell yourself negative things a lot, you can start to believe they are true. Chances are they're lies you tell yourself. Before you turn to unhealthy habits to feel better, give those lies the boot! Here are some common lies and how to cope.
Lie #1: I'm not attractive.
Try: Doing a reality check.
Feel bad because of how perfect models and stars look? Remember, it's not real. Stylists and airbrushing help them look that way. Next, look at yourself. Find specific features that you like. Maybe you have great eyes or an incredible smile. Focus on the positives.
Positive self-talk:
Think about something positive when you're feeling bad. If you do this long enough, you can change your brain for the better. Here's how to do it.
Step 1: Realize when you put yourself down.
Step 2: Actively say a positive message to yourself instead.
Step 3: Repeat.
Lie #2: I'm fat.
Try: Questioning your belief.
First, there's more to you than how you look. Plus, we often believe negative thoughts without any proof. Worried you're overweight? Make an appointment with your doctor. You could also use a teen BMI (body mass index) calculator to get a better idea of where you stand. If your doctor let's you know you're in the overweight range, work together. You can come up with a plan to get healthier and feel better.
Lie #3: I'm bad at sports.
Try: Shifting your focus.
Feeling less than athletic? To get better - practice working on your skills or strength. In the meantime, focus on what you like about sports. Maybe you like your teammates or being outside. Being active is also a great way to burn off stress.
Lie #4: I'm not smart.
Try: Figuring out what you can control.
Nobody's good at everything but you can get smarter. Ask yourself - "Have I gone to my teacher or parents for help?". When things are tough, think about your past successes for inspiration. What are some challenges you and your friends or family members have overcome?
Lie #5: I don't have any friends.
Try: Checking your perspective.
Don't measure your friends by how many you have on Facebook. It's about having good friends. Feeling lonely? Join clubs or teams, volunteer, or take classes to find some friends. Having something in common can help you have an instant bond with people.
Lie #6: I'm too short or too tall.
Try: Letting go.
Height isn't something you can control. Wishing you'd grow taller? Or that you didn't stand out so much? The answer is the same - stand up straight. Good posture makes everyone look confident and better. Then, to keep the confidence going strong, tell yourself something good - like how kind or funny you are.
Practice makes perfect - saying to yourself that you're pretty or smart just once won't work. You believe negative thoughts because you hear them over and over. It's going to take some work and time to replace them but it is doable.
Help from your friends - don't suffer in silence when you're having a hard time. Talk to a parent, coach, or counselor - especially if you've been feeling bad for more than a couple of weeks. For a boost when you're just feeling blah, hang out with friends. They can help you remember your best qualities and feel better.