listen to me

you are not selfish for wanting to die

i miss when you would squint your eyes

to catch flakes of light caught in your lashes

but i still feel you

everywhere i go

you're living in my fingertips and i'm leaving traces of you

for everyone to see

that you are still here

i want you to take your medication

when you're supposed to take it

take the proper amount

cry if you need to,

but realize it is okay to need help sometimes

i want you to put your shoes on today

and step outside

skip school if you need to

just talk to the flowers and trees and bugs

don't try for your mother or your sister or me,

do it for yourself

because you will always be worth trying

you will always be worth life

whether it trembles on through three am phone calls

or brushes itself through your hair when you dance in your underwear

you are not selfish for wanting to die

you are human and you are here and i feel it