hi y'all i'm not really in a writing mood so this will probably come out short and head-on the subject even though i don't even know what the subject will turn out to be. oh well let me tell you about my day. i now officially have christmas holiday and i'm surprisingly enough not as happy as i usually am about that. i will miss my classmates bc tbh they're the best class ever and my heart aches when i think about what a short time we have left together ugh. i got my grades and i'm not very content with them but i never will be until i have a:s in everything so i'll have to let it go i guess.

 

the schoolday today was basically: cleaning out my locker, cleaning our classroom, go to church and listen to the school choir's concert and then back to school to eat and get my grades. i'd like to tell you about the concert but i don't know how to type it to make it understandable so i'll just skip that. okay i'll try. three boys stopped in the middle of the song they were singing and dedicated one directions song 'what makes you beautiful' to one of the teachers and idk how i feel about them reminding me of 1d in school so i got both irritated and amused so idk but i guess it was pretty damn fun anyways ugh???

 

when i got home i showed my grades to my mom and she started nagging on me that i had to count my points and check if i would be getting into the school i want to and i got a headache and yeah i didn't do it i don't even know what i'm saying sry. she was proud of me though is guess but ugh i can't absorb the compliments about me being intelligent and hard-working and such a good student it's like i'm waterproof and the compliments are water so they're just kind of floating off of me immediately. like in school all my teachers also says to me that i'm really clever but i kind of just look at them as if they're the stupidest people i've ever met bc i just can't ugh no. honestly every single on of my teachers are saying that if i'll just gain more confidence and actually start believing i can do stuff i would get higher grades so that's something i'm gonna have to work on.

 

however i've also cleaned my entire room and watched the movie 'a cinderella story' (I FRICKIN LOVE HILARY DUFF OKAY) and i've showered and exercised. btw my appetite sucks and i'm never hungry (what's wrong with me??? seriously getting tired of this). all i've eaten today is oatmeal (like 3 spoons???), 2 clementines, a banana, a little pasta, chocolate and crispbread. oh well maybe it was more than i thought idk. i bought a magazine that i haven't even glanced at so i might read that a little now but i'm not sure. idk what to say so uhh yeah. this became way longer than i though it would so bless you if you've read this whole thing omg haha. bye love you.