stay in one place your whole life. always order vanilla even though the menu is four pages long. become the type of person who sends back lattes. save up your money for a plasma tv instead of a plane ticket. talk a lot about things you know nothing about. have an affair with someone you don't even find attractive.

 

refuse to forget your ex. make it impossible for yourself to do anything without remembering that you used to do it with them. hug your knees under the sheets and think about how safe you felt when they held you at night. remind yourself daily of how empty you feel. find new ways to make yourself sad.

 

get drunk all the time. consider no saturday night, national holiday or extended happy hour complete without a vodka-induced breakdown. graduate college but keep drinking like you’re still in it. notice that cheap beer tastes watery and stale when you drink it alone but drink it anyway. look at old facebook photos wasted and wonder where everyone went.