omg today was probably the worst day of my life or at least a real shitty one. already when i woke up my mood was terrible and i actually even thought about not going to school. however i still ate breakfast and straightened my hair and put on makeup and all of that but like after that i just layed in my bed thinking about how much i just wanted to stay in it all day long. even though my day actually wasn't that terrible thinking of my lessons and all of that there's just been something bringing my mood down and i don't even know what it is. actually everyone's been really nice and polite and funny today and basically none of my lessons has been a pain in the ass but like still ugh i don't know.

 

first thing in the morning we had p.e. and we did this fitness test and before that i felt so sick like i would throw up any moment but i actually did better than i have in a lot of years on the test so that felt really good bc that way i know my exercising is showing off which feels soooo nice. after that we had a math test and hopefully it went pretty well even though i couldn't solve all problems but yeah over-all i think it went well. idk why i'm telling you about every lesson but whatever - moving on. on the swedish lesson we watched the first part of an english christmas movie and with only english subtitles so i honestly don't really know why we watched it on the swedish lesson but whatever i love english so like no problem thank you very much???

then it was lunch and like you probably remember from yesterday i'm feeling sick whenever i'm eating and today hasn't been an exception so i almost didn't eat anything but i wasn't even hungry so i guess no harm or well yes harm idk what i'm saying sry. then we had art (i love that class bc i've always loved painting and creating and things like that) and i finished a painting we've been working on for like 8 weeks or something (???) and i swear i had heart palpitations bc it didn't went like i expected it too and i always get upset when something like that happens when i'm the only one responsible and like the colors were messing with me today and i couldn't blend it perfectly and hahahah omg i sound like a freak now but whatever. in the end of that lesson the teacher took me aside and told me that i would be getting the grade A so i guess that's great bc it's as high on the scale as you can get but for some reason i still don't feel like i'm worth it and i'm not at all as happy as i could be and when he told me he was like "you almost look angry were you hoping for another grade???" and i was like "no, sry i'm just no good at reacting to things like this" and he was like "oh okay" and i don't know why i'm telling you this omg. then we had a terribly boring lesson where we're supposed to catch up with work we haven't finished but i'm done with everything cause it's like only a couple of days left on this term so i spent 40 minutes reading an awful book so that sucked. the last lesson (english) we watched the rest of that christmas movie and in the end of that class we also got a surprise which was that tomorrow we're gonna be able to sleep a little longer since our first lesson would be cancelled bc our teacher had to be home taking care of her sick kids so we also have no homework for tomorrow which is awesome so to sum this day up it should have been one of the best days ever but it's been totally the opposite which sucks ugh. i'm just gonna spend the rest of the night in my bed maybe watching some movies or something and then i also need to exercise but that'll be later.

 

now this was a hell of a post don't you think??? i guess my writing ability is back or what do you think??? i'm sorry if anyone's actually reading this omfg bless your soul ilysm bye.